Saturday, March 04, 2006

A Little Bit of Bloggy Housekeeping to keep me from ACTUAL Housekeeping

Let's see. Where to start.

Oh yeah. The fish that we bought to be the friend of the fish Nat won at a Halloween Party when she was 2 (didja follow all that?) finally kicked it. I was pretty sure that thing was going to outlive me. It was older than both of my sons. I named it Buddy since we got it to be the buddy of the first fish (whom I named Fiddy after R spent Fiddy Damn Dollahs on a stupid fish tank for a 10-cent WalMart goldfish). The kids later changed his (and I'm assuming it's a boy, we never checked) name to Nemo in honor of the Disney Movie Du Jour.

The most memorable event in Buddy's life, in my estimation, was when he we found him swimming upside down. Not floating, mind you, swimming upside down. Buddy looked as though he had somehow swallowed a little bitty teeny balloon and it was forcing him to swim belly-up. Nat was absolutely HYSTERICAL. In fairness to her, this whole debacle occurred last summer, right after her best friend Jack died - a very VERY sad story for another day - so she was beside herself. "Nemo is my Best Friend! All my friends keep dying!!!!" she sobbed.

So R quickly went into Dad Mode and scoured the internet in search of What To Do When Your Goldfish is Swimming Upside Down with a Big Fat Belly.

And here's what he found out.

You have to buy some frozen peas, steam them, shell them, smoosh them up, and feed them to the fish for about 3-4 days. Seemed like it was worth a try, so R went out and bought some frozen peas and we began The Frozen Pea Treatment.

The shit WORKED. Who knew?? A few days later, Buddy was back to his old self. I couldn't believe it.

So I told this story of the Upside Down Goldfish to my friend/Beloved Local Meteorologist, who incorporated the whole sordid tale into a segment on his morning show that he calls "Pick City", where he gives a little schpiel about a particular city and shows what the high temperature will be in that city that day. Usually he does a Pick City theme for the week, like the week before Cardinals Opening Day, for example, he uses cities with Cardinal Player names like Edmonds, Indiana (Gold Glove Centerfielder Jim Edmonds); Albert, Oklahoma (NL MVP Albert Pujols), you get the idea. I set my alarm for 6:15 every morning so I can watch the Pick City part of the show, whether I need to get out of bed or not.

Anyway, the day after I told him the story, the Pick City segment went like this:

"A friend of mine named Sarah told me that her goldfish was swimming - not floating - upside down in the tank, and her kids started freaking out because it didn't look too good for the fish, so her husband went on the internet to find out what to do. It turns out that you have to get some frozen peas, steam them, shell them, mash them up and feed them to the fish for a few days. And they did it, and it worked, the fish is fine, and so in honor of Sarah's fish, the Pick City for today is -

Mashpee, Massachusetts."

It was hilarious.

The fish tank bubbles are still on, because, after 6 years, the house sounds weird without them. Maybe we'll get more fish. Maybe I'll put my sewing machine in the spot where the tank currently resides, as I've been threatening to for quite a while. Or maybe it would be nice just to have some space there. I haven't decided yet.


Moving on -

Poopy Diaper Head Monkeemaven is apparently not convinced that I'm actually related to Amylovie, but I am, and until I can find the pic of my kids playing with her kids at her Moms, my aunt MaryAnn's house, here's the best I can do as far as proving it. Here's a pic from my sister's wedding. MaryAnn (Amylovie's mom) and her husband (my mom's brother Ron) are on either side of the bride's head. I am next to the PreacherMan (my dad). Alas, Amylovie is NOT in that picture, because she quite understandably didn't make the 800-mile trip right after Christmas, but she was there in spirit when the pic I posted yesterday of the 5 cousins popped up in the rehearsal dinner slide show.



The Karma family is planning a trip to South Texas in about a week and a half, and I'm sure some Quality Time will be spent with the Lovie Fam, so I'll see what geneological photodocumentation I can get. Not that I should have to prove my lineage to anybody, sheesh.


Next, it's Oscar Night Eve! Here's the latest update on the Oscar Soiree A La Penny Karma.

Here are the Playahs who have submitted predictions so far:

knottygnome
fluffyewe
spudd
bezzie
tabbytuxedo
trillian_42
MJ
stacie
cpurl17

and then of course there's myself and R.

As it stands, the prediction breakdown is as follows:

For Best Picture, Brokeback Mountain is in the lead with 77%.
Crash scored 23%.

55% of the playahs think Philip Seymour Hoffman is going to win Best Actor. In second place is Joaquin Phoenix in Walk The Line. I watched Walk the Line last night. Reese was a hoot! And wasn't Johnny an ASS when he was messed up? Dang!

George Clooney is predicted to win Best Supporting Actor by 55% of playahs. If you should need a Clooney fix, I recommend O Brother, Where Art Thou. I'm a HUGE Coen Brothers fan. Right behind George (and that's not an intentional play on words although it kinda does sound like one in this context) is Jake Gylenhaal with 44%.

Reese Witherspoon's portrayal of June Carter Cash was Best Actress Oscar-Worthy, according to 55% of the playahs. The other 44% are predicting that Felicity Huffman (and her Prosthetic Penis) will be the Big Wiener. Damn, I'm funny!

In the Best Supporting Actress category, it's a very close race between Catherine Keener (33%), Frances McDormand (who's married to a Coen brother but I forget which one), Rachel Weisz, and Michelle Williams (each with 22%).

Brokeback Mountain was the Best Adapted Screenplay choice for 77% of playahs, Munich got the only dissenting vote.

Crash is the frontrunner for Best Original Screenplay with 44%. Good Night and Good Luck and Syriana each have 22% of the predictions.

And, in what, to many, is the "close your eyes and throw a dart" category of Best Foreign Film, 55% of playahs' darts hit Paradise Now, and 33% hit Tsotsi. Both films actually sound like places in which I would NOT want to be hit by a dart.

Finally, in the ubervague category of Best Cinematography, Memoirs of a Geisha leads the pack with 44% of the predictions. Brokeback Mountain and The New World each garnered a respectable 22%.

There's still time to get your predictions in, if ya wanna be a Playah too! And why wouldn't ya? There's a Friggin Sweet Prize for whoever gets the most right. Noon Sunday (Central Time) is the deadline.


And One More Thing.

Like a True Catholic, which, ironically, I'm NOT, I have figured out a way around my Lenten resolve not to buy yarn.

I'm gonna buy fabric, cut it into strips, and USE it as yarn. Aren't I brilliant?

I think I'll make Tinsel.


Oh wait, one more One More Thing -

I finally bound off the Muppestesque Fug. Yeah, it's every bit as bad as I thought. But I AM gonna wear it to Oscar Night! Take THAT, Hilary Swank!


And don't forget to chime in on Worst Oscar Attire (male and female) on Monday. Nuthin like a little Fashion Bashin'!

9 comments:

Jennifer said...

I'm eagerly awaiting Oscar night...

Very cute story about a loved fish. And the name "Fiddy," I love it!

Stacie said...

screw housework, I've got bogging to my immaginary friends to do! I think I may dig out an old prom dress for the Oscars... may poat a photo, if I can get anyoone else in the famto dress up too... emailing my predictions as soon as the kids get off this chair!

Penny Karma said...

Yeah, there ya go! We should have a Red Carpet Party Along!

Bezzie said...

Mashed peas! Believe it or not I've seen that upside down fish syndrome before. Now I know how to cure it. But the damn weatherman story was too friggin' hilarious! You crack me up!

Nederlass said...

MJ/Nederlass here, did we forget the Best Director category??

DOH!

Can I vote for Ang Lee?

Penny Karma said...

Yeah, I guess I did leave off Best Director! Oops.

I shall rectify the matter immediately.

amylovie said...

Hi Sarah,

My mom, who reads your blog BTW & loves it, sent me a 911 email saying that people didn't believe that I was your cuz. I will shout it from the highest hills, well from my blog at least, that you are. That naughty Monkee!

Emily looks amazing! I never would have taken her as a traditional wedding dress kind of gal. You are lookin' mighty fine yourself too.

You are coming to the Lone Star State?? Dang, my mom doesn't tell me anything! Do you think you will come to Weimar? If so, the girls and I will definitely make a trip over. Take some photographic cuz evidence. Maybe you could sweet talk Aunt Kathy into taking you to Katy. Would rolling around in 1200 sq. feet of yarn tickle your fancy....hmmmm? I know that you've given up yarn buying for Lent, but when you are back in business you will get the family discount price (wholesale cost) on yarn in my shop.

Amy

Penny Karma said...

SEE??!!???

YAY! And what a complete hoot that MA reads this garbage.

The chiddrins and I are flying down on the 15th (God help us), and then R's coming on the 19, and we're staying till the 24th. I am confident that we'll manage a trip to the thriving metropolis of Weimar! I was going to ask your recommendations on LYS's in the area.

And I think I might actually have to swing by Chez Monkee in Alvin - so's she can smooch my big' ol dimply BUTT.

Ali said...

Hey,

I should be on the list for the party :) I had an invitation...I swear I did. LET.ME.IN!

Oh yeah, I'm waiting on DH to bring home some batteries for the cam that died today. I left it on all morning :(