More Inspirational Tampons.
You may remember the last batch of these. They were funny.
Once again, Playtex Sport, you have amused me more than a tampon really should.
I'm supposed to run an extra mile when I'm on the rag? RIGHT.
I could challenge myself to see how loud I can say FUCK OFF, would that count?
We're probably all on the same cycle by now!
I love how they cover their asses on this one - they want me to play to win (and I believe that one of my tampons last month assured me that it was "on my team"), but what if I'm a lazyass who doesn't really feel like challenging myself and I'd just prefer to sit on the sidelines doubled over and cursing Eve?
Oh yeah, see? I told you Winning Isn't Everything.
Thank you, I'll be in the locker room if you bitches need me.
Now THAT, I can do.
I'll be celebrating my bold attitude with a Margarita.
Particularly when it comes to Stalking.
Restraining orders are for pussies!
Prove your devotion! MAKE him love you!!
How 'bout if I skooch over a little to make room for you, and we get all catty and talk shit about all the other girls? Sound fun?
By "You" I assume you're referring to my Fallopian Tubes?
Sigh... It's almost enough to make me actually look forward to that time of the month.
I said ALMOST.
7 comments:
Awesome! thank you! I thought it was a joyous day yesterday when I got free pantyliner samples in the mail, but I'm completely overcome today by inspirational-tampon-induced ecstasy.
These posts always inspire me so...
Penny - I'll make you a margarita any time you want.
There are plenty of links for tampon-related crafts if these buggers really get to annoying you...Show those cotton plugs who's boss by dipping them in paint and making conversation pieces out of them!!
Word verification: SCORNED. Never trust a tampon scorned...
Scorned is right up there with grope for best verification word ever.
Thank G-d for menopause. What are all of us couch potato menstruators (this would include my daughter) supposed to do, wallow in our athletic ineptitude all month long? As if a non-athletic girl's self-esteem doesn't take constant hits enough...sh*t.
Makes me grateful I had my surgery when I did...
Oh, and my verification word looks a lot like "mucus"...
Kev, which came first? The groping or the scorning?? Seems like I've been on both sides of that fence...
These are really funny. I also like your blog because I think you're borderline nuts and I like that. With your permission, I'm going to put a link on my blog. Please feel free to do the same with mine. Thanks and keep up the good work.
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