Saturday, May 27, 2006

Penny Karma's Day Off

Wow, I didn't realize it had been so long since I last posted. You haven't missed anything. Oh, wait -

There's been Major Enlightenment on the Pork Butt issue.

Trillian42 says: Pork butts aren't actually butts! It's the shoulder! Apparently, when you butcher a pig, the shoulder has two parts - the shank end and the butt end. (Thank you, Alton Brown!) So, now you know you can safely eat pork butt without thinking you are eating, you know, pork BUTT.

Thank GOD. Pork Butt sounds like something they make you eat on Fear Factor. So if Pork Butt is really Pork Shoulder, then is the stuff that's called Pork Shoulder actually something else?
Pork Neck? (Isn't that a city in New Jersey?)

Moving on... here's some more stuff I don't understand.

Why can a 4-year-old child hear the freakin' Goody Bar Man's truck coming from a half-mile away but not hear his mother in the next room when she calls him to come take his bath?

Why did I drive myself crazy for four days straight cleaning a house that the inlaws would be visiting for all of maybe five minutes? I wish I'd taken Before pictures to show you, but just to give you an idea, my house was just a tiny bit cleaner than one of the lovely abodes you might see raided on COPS.

I worked my lily-white ass down to a nub.

I was almost too tired to enjoy Penny Karma's Day Off. But I managed to pull it together and get my hair cut, have lunch, and go shopping for sandals. These are not necessarily thrilling or luxurious events in and of themselves, but without kids, ahhhhh, so peaceful. I secretly laughed at moms who were trying to get their kids to behave. Hopefully my brood is behaving for MIL and FIL. It's 95 degrees out now and I don't know about you, but I get crabby when it gets too hot out. I'm praying that they can all get along. R and I are going out to pick them up around dinnertime. I'm going to wear my awesome new sandals.

I should add Born Shoes to Sarah's Favorite Things. Born shoes are made from the softest leather and they feel SO fabulous on. They're more expensive than what I would usually spend on a pair of shoes, so I always wait for them to go on sale. I got these on Super Duper 40% off Clearance, for $33!

They have a higher heel than most shoes in my closet. I'm a wee bit concerned about that, to be honest. I'm not a tall person, and I've never wanted to be tall. Maybe that's because my sister is 6'2" and she hates being tall. I'm 5'6". I like how tall I am. I don't think I've ever worn a pair of heels in my life. I wore pumps to my sister's wedding and my feet were killing me after an hour of standing in one place. I get wobbly in anything that isn't totally parallel to the ground. Stilettos are pretty much out of the question. Guess I can't be a stripper after all. Darn.

I'm sitting here typing this now and my house is so quiet it's weird. I can hear the ceiling fan. I never realized it made any noise.

I have about an hour before R gets home. Maybe I'll give myself a half-assed pedicure. Maybe I'll knit and watch the ballgame. Maybe I'll nap. I should throw in a load of laundry. But I'm not gonna. Too bad I don't have time to borrow a Red Ferrari, sneak my girlfriend out of school and go to a Cubs game, a five-star restaurant, the art museum and a parade. I'm kinda leaning towards NAP right now.

** tangent alert **
Here's a story from the file I'll call WHATEVER WORKS.

Tito pooped on the potty on Tuesday! I somehow convinced him to try sitting on the potty since he woke up dry, and he and I sat in there for about 30 minutes waiting for the sound of tinkle, and all of a sudden I heard a little plink! I think it surprised both of us.

So yesterday he and I kinda got into a tiff because I wanted him to go try on the potty and he wanted a sandwich first. So I came up with a compromise. He sat on the potty with a sandwich. Beeb took her sandwich in there and read to him, per his request. And then, because he didn't want to be left out, Pie brought his sammich in there too. It was a Potty Picnic.

Notice Ryan's light saber on the floor, just in case there might be Imperial Guards hiding behind the shower curtain.
Hey, ya never know.

I don't know that I'd do the Potty Picnic again, though, since somehow Tommy managed to get peanut butter on his weenie. If he wasn't three years old, I'd think that was a little creepy.

I miss those lil stinkers. Kinda.


Elspeth said...

I've always heard of these mythical tall people who "hate" to be tall (I know many who seem okay with it, though) -- being a short person who hates to be short I guess I should understand, but it's hard!

Congrats on the potty! We have to train our littlest (20 mos.) soon and it's kind of scary ...

cpurl17 said...

I'm so glad you had a nice day off! And good score on the shoes! I truly believe the feets deserve a splurge since they have to hold us up all day long.

jackt said...

Haha those Imperial Guards are always hiding behind shower curtains because their outfits blend in so well with shower curtains.

Bezzie said...

Ah the first poop is always the most special. I came close to taking a picture and emailing it to the grandparents, but figured that might be a little weird.

Glad you had a nice day off!!

Cheryl said...

What???!!! You mean everyone doesn't have peanut butter on their weenies???? Hmm....

turtlegirl76 said...

I have a pair of Born Sandals I got on sale as well. Oh. My. God. Talk about comfort. It's all I wear outside of the office.