Wednesday, May 17, 2006

More Weird Searches That Lead People To Your Blog

Ok, I guess somebody realized that my blog has absolutely nothing to do with Barbie and removed the link to my blog from that site, but I swear it was there.

Today, I discovered another search that will bring you to my blog:

homeless mom needs a place for her and kids in St.Louis

Tell me that's not just a little creepy. Here's the little clip from the Yahoo search page:

BEHOLD MY BRILLIANCE (or lack thereof)
... there? Ry: Mom, Dumbass isn't a PLACE. We can't go ... My kids are SO freaked out by her. Can't say that ... the Yarn Harlot at the St. Louis County Library - 79k - Cached

It almost sounds like I'm saying that my Dumbass kids were freaked out by the Yarn Harlot at the Library. I apologize in advance to Stephanie, should she ever feel the compulsion to Google herself and think I'm talkin' smack. I'm not. Love the Harlot.

So far the weirdest searches that I've found linked to me are "gay self-suck", "pubic" and "she cut my dick off". Now Pubic, that one I can understand, but the others, I have NO idea. I giggle when I imagine the profound disappointment those searchers feel when they find that I'm just a goofball SAHM with WAY-HAY-HAY too much time on her hands who knits and bitches about her inlaws and publicly berates half-wits who can't spell Garage.

If you perhaps thought I was a nasty person for mocking someone whose mother's house burned down (in which case you probably don't know me very well - I'm a totally irreverent asshole when the situation warrants), you'll be relieved to know that there was an update today:

Thank you to all that give my mother in law stuff, thank so much, she really appreciate it, what i have recieved so for is, hand mixer, towels, kitchen towels, skillts, pots, dishdriner, alot of cups.

This is the rest of the stuff that my mother is still needing, if anyone has anything, please let me know, it doesnt have to on the list really anything will help. Thank you

Can opener, Bowls,(mixing bowls and ceral bowls), Anytype of plates, silverware, silkets, potholders, toaster, and any kitchen cooking unitals.

Full size sheets, pilliow cases, and or anything bathroom stuff.

Lamps, it can be a table lamp or a free standing lamp doesnt matter.

If anyone have any of these items, please let me know, I know its alot but she really needs all of this, she is restarting her life because of the fire, Thank you for reading

Thank you yall for everything.

Again with the Unitals! And what's the Dillio with Pilliow?
Oh, Lord. My head hurts.

R and I went to lunch at The Cheesecake Factory Today. I had the Fried Mac and Cheese Balls. R had the Shepherd's Pie. Then we both had the Toblerone Cheesecake. We'd never been there before, and it was a great experience. We had a spectacular server, and of course the food was excellent. I'll definitely go back.

Got my SP7's name, and it appears to be a great match as far as experience level and Slightly Offbeat Sense of Humor. I haven't heard from either my upstream or my downstream in the One Skein SP thing, so whatever. I guess it's a wash.

I got my Grand Finale Spoilage from my CASP/CFSP Poppins! Have I mentioned how thoroughly Poppins ROCKS? Seriously, I am in bewildered awe of her creativity. She is brilliant, hilarious, and awesome. She sent me an actual Lucky Penny! I have been so inspired by her as a knitter, a mom and even just as a person. I totally love when I get to know cool people through the SP stuff. My downstreams were extremely cool women too, and we were all named SARAh! What are the chances?

I also received a wonderful Semi-Random Act of Divine Benevolence from the Incredibly Sweet and Indescribably Thoughtful Cheesy Knit Wit, Dkswife! Look at these fantastic colors!! Thank you, Kay!

My kids have discovered Little Einsteins. It beats the hell out of Caillou. I'd like to personally beat the hell out of Caillou myself, but that's only because a wicked flash of Caillou Karma recently bit me on the ass. Due to Blockbustah's return/purchase policy, I had to purchase the Caillou DVD that I had purposely hidden after Tommy had made me watch it a zillion times and driven me to the edge of a sugar coma, and then I subsequently forgot where I'd hidden it. Of course, Tommy found it after I got charged for it and we watched it daily for a week until the Merciful Mother of God intervened and one day Tommy picked out Little Einsteins instead.

I had to completely start over on my tea cozy due to the embarrassing fact that I can't count to 32.

Got me some sock-knittin' needles yesterday. Oooooh, baby! Next I need to get my Yarntopia Sock Yarn and I'll be all Posse-fied. That sounds funny.

My kids are watching The Princess Bride right now. I am the coolest mom in the world.


Bezzie said...

Wow, it's good to know that first freecycle email wasn't just a fluke. Maybe that kid was the one that burned momma's house down.

He probably decided to have some hot ceral one morning, went to look for a silket to cook some sausage instead, but in the process caught his cooking unital in the stove and wasn't able to grab a pilliow to smother the fire out.

Hey, an easy trick I've learned about those annoying kid DVDs. Sometimes they get "scratched" and they're unwatchable. It's tragic. Really it is.

jackt said...

A lot of people in LA poo poo Cheesecake Factory, but I do enjoy the food there. The lines are long though. I guess I don't like the advertisements in the menu either. But that BBQ meatloaf sandwich is awesome.

Elizabeth said...

I think you may be my new hero... so, how do I get in on the Cheapass Hootenanny? I've never participated in say, a KAL or SP thing... do I just put a comment on the "cheepchix" blog to get in the mix? I'm so confused, as usual, but I want to be added, since I am cheap in more ways than one ;-)

Penny Karma said...

Does a bear knit in the woods? Of COURSE you can hook up with the cheapasses!

Here's the link for all the info:

It's SO fun.

The Fluffy Ewe said...

Atleast T isnt into Dora. OMG I hate Dora but DS likes it. I weaned him off of Little Einsteind after Annie's wretched tone deafness sent me up the walls. Now it's all about Blue. I like Bezzie's rememdy for coma inducing DVDs.

Besides the long lines, the thing I hate about the Cheesecake Factory is the extensive menu. It takes me forever to find a plate I would like becasue they all look delish.

Oh and whats the diff between a silket and a skillts??

Ed said...

Michele and I got married to the theme song from The Princess Bride...It's one of our favorite movies...


DomesticOverlord said...

Love the Little Einsteins at my house! On car trips now we listen to Grieg, Vivaldi, Mozart, Dvorak, etc intead of annoying kids' CDs. SO what if I have to sing, "oh yes, oh yes it's spring time" to Four Seasons now? At least it's not that damn map song from Dora.

Princess Bride rules. I made my 11 yaer old brother watch it because I was sick of Star Wars. I love the book. I love the movie. Love it.

Penny Karma said...

BYW - those little packets are bags of tea, not condoms.