Another Saturday with The Apes.

Yesterday, after I endured all the drama and the follow-up butt-smooch from the day before and actually managed to stick to my guns and prohibit them from leaving the house instead of giving in to their plaintive "but we proooooooomise we'll be good..."(and, in hindsight, why the hell did I do that when it punishes ME more than anyone?), I did take the Ape Squad to the Zoo.

You would not believe how quiet they were in the car on the way there. It was poetic.

Everyone stayed together. Nobody fought. Nobody got lost. We rode the train. We got lunch at the Cafe. The only problem was when I caught Tito playing in the sand in an ashtray. Yuck.

But that was it.

It's so worth spending a day as a miserable hardass if we can go out and behave like civilized human beings afterwards.

Today is Saturday. This morning we walked over to the haircut place near us and the kids got supercute haircuts. I always feel like the stylist thinks I didn't tip enough. I can't do the math in my head and I get frazzled.

Random real-time interjection: Oh my GAWD, T has the STANKiest dipe on record goin' on right now and of course he won't let me change it. Frankly, I don't know if I even could get close enough to him to change it without passing out. He walked in the room and I almost puked. It's... just so... I mean... words fail me.

Must go. My eyes are watering.