Saturday, June 17, 2006

J is for ...

Jorge! The Jorge Quatro-hombre Grill!
Ok, I cheated, but I just wanted to show you guys a picture of my new favorite thing.

This is the third George Foreman Grill I've purchased and this one is by far my favorite. We used it last night to cook eight Nathan's Hot Dogs (another one of my favorite things, btw) simultaneously. I can cook eight burgers or six chicken breasts on it. It's huge. I LOVE LOVE LOVE it. AND, my friends, the best part about it is that the grill plates are removable for super-easy cleanup! This feature is fantastic. The Official Name of this latest and greatest Foreman Grill is THE NEXT GRILLERATION. It does not have a picture of Captain Picard on it, but it should.

(And here's the part where, if this were the Oprah show, she'd say AND EVERYONE IN THE STUDIO AUDIENCE WILL RECEIVE ONE!! whereupon legions of suburban housewives would squeal with giddy glee. But this ain't the Oprah Show, folks. Sorry.)

And K is for... Kitty Litter.

Here's what was on the floor in the back seat of my car until it turned funkalicious. And whatever's making the floor wet is definitely coming from under the car, making the car smell like Fumunda Cheese. Good thing I don't drive carpool.

I was once told by a guy working at a full-service car wash that the interior of my car was the dirtiest car he'd ever seen. Actually, I was kinda joking coyly with him at first, like "You can tell me if my car is the dirtiest car you've ever seen", but I really didn't expect him to agree that it was. And he was clearly not kidding. Oh well.

What he did not realize, however, is that the filthy interior of my car serves multiple purposes. First, it's a very effective anti-theft device. My car has never been stolen. Second, if we were ever stuck in a snowdrift, we'd be able to live on the french fries under the seat until the rescue party came to save us. So don't mock my methods, Car Wash Guy.

Next topic: WHY I'M AWESOME.

I found this lovely robe at a church sale last week and knew Beebie would like it. I really kinda hate animal prints, especially in unnatural colors, but Beeb really dug it. I paid a whopping fifty cents for it, so the fact that it was missing the belt was really not a big deal. I got home and found in my stash a beautiful purple fluffy fleece single skein that I'd bought just because I loved the color and the feel of it. I cast on six stitches and just started knitting. It came out beautifully, wouldn't you say?
I was so proud of myself. I TOTALLY ROCK.

Learning to knit has made me so creative and resourceful. Did you know that Batgirl was originally drawn with knitting needles in her Bat-Utility Belt but it was decided that such an image perpetuated sexist stereotypes? Ok, I made that up, but can you imagine if MacGuyver knew how to knit, the contraptions he'd be able to create? Seriously, it would double his inventory of High Tech Gadgetry Made From Everyday Objects. He could probably knit a zip-line rope from his own hair. Knitting is definitely a useful problem-solving skill.

Maybe I'll knit a Resume Cozy for my next job interview.

And as soon as Blogger stops being a moody bitch, I'll post a pic of the drawstring bag with the wonky stripage.

Amended: I'm a Word Geek.

This morning on The Chris Matthews Show, Kelly O'Donnell used the word "blithefully", and I gasped in horror. There is no word "blithefully". The correct word is "blithely". Blithe is not a noun. Wonder and Beauty are nouns, and as such they can easily become adjectives such as Wonderful and Beautiful. Blithe is an adjective. Adjectives such as Blithe, and the two we just created, Wonderful and Beautiful, can easily become adverbs like Blithely, Wonderfully, and Beautifully.

Just so ya know.

EDIT: Blythe is the Old English spelling. Maybe. Or maybe I'm an enormous dork, but I still say Kelly O'Donnell is a bigger dork.


jackt said...

Jean-Luc Karma: Engage!

That robe- it's very Liberace. :)

turtlegirl76 said...

Heh, so, you didn't mention how the cleaning up of the kitty litter is coming along? I really hope you can get it up without too much trouble. I feel for ya.

I need a Jorge Foreman! I have a little tiny one with the plates all scratched up, but talk about dinner fast! I love that thing! I need a new one. But I don't have enough counter space to keep it out, oh well.

Dan said...

Sorry word geek, but...the correct word is blithe. That is according to your link to M-W. :)

Penny Karma said...

Just wanted to see if there was a bigger Word Geek than me.

Congratulations, DAN!

Bezzie said...

Nice Foreman! I've got the George Foreman grilled cheese maker.

Way to go with that robe belt--you matched the color of the collar right on. Beeb looks great.

And with Batgirl being a lesbian--would knitting needles be too phallic to carry on her person at all times??? Hmm...

bradyphrenia said...

"blithefully?" i think i've just found a new non-word to add to my Fake Word Lexicon.