Wednesday, January 21, 2009

What Tito's teacher must think of me.

It's a proud moment, as a parent (and especially as the literary sort), when you see your child discovering the written word as an effective means of communication.



Until you read the translation.



So, just to recap, here's what my kindergartener has told his teacher:

Mommy drinks and drives all the time.
Mommy puts Medicine in her soda.
Mommy won't let me go to the park.
Mommy makes me sad.


Perfect.

9 comments:

Kashmir Knitter said...

You're either going to NEVER hear from his teacher or she'll pull you aside and talk to you in soothing tones to distract you while the strike team assembles.

Personally, I think you should get some kind of Awesome Mom Award but then again, I'm not you kid. :D

You totally rule.

Disco said...

As long as you teach them your incredible sense of humour, I think they'll make it through.

Your blog is like a late-night-SAHM version of the Office. I can see you glancing up at the camera ala "Jim" when you read the translated script.

Go on, email your blog to NBC as the screenplay :0)

Rip said...

TITO! Stop ratting out your Soccer Mom to your teacher! She's got enough to worry about!

Geez, PK, no wonder you pack a flask wherever you go--with narcs like that, who needs enemies?

(word verification macroose. Kinda like a contraction of Skater's name and caboose, of which I know you are fond)

Speed Racer said...

How about "mommy plays with big needles?"

Yes, a guy makes a knitting joke.

I am SO getting kicked out of the guy club!

sent with best wishes for your upcoming parent teacher conference from beautiful Daytona Beach :)

SiressYorkie said...

I'm pretty sure that as a teacher, she knows the difference between a kid who is honest about what his mom says and a kid who's so petrified of his mum that he can't even speak and sits in a corner all hunched over. They teach you what to look for in Teacher School, remember...

You're like me: you love your kids with every fiber of your being but wonder if your love is somehow imperfect. I know how it goes.

I will, however, laugh my head off when Tito reports to his teacher, "This weekend, my mother made me wrestle and eat a live cat." Now THAT would be worth a call from the principal, even if it's to say, "Day-um, Mrs Karma, c'mon over and show me how you do that...!"

Cindy in Happy Valley said...

Is it too early to teach tact?

Kashmir Knitter said...

Dude, to expand on Speed Racer's joke:

"My mommy shares needles."

And if you take up crochet:

"My mommy is a hooker now."

Speed Racer said...

KK - thank you for taking my joke to the next level. I'm still learning all this knitting stuff.

Penny Karma said...

KK - You'll always be D.O. to me.