Wednesday, February 13, 2008

A glutton for punishment, I am.

I fear that I will forever be the tortured soul who does what's right even at the expense of her own sanity. I don't normally talk spirituality on here, but recently I've been making a concerted effort to find my inner stillness - to consciously still my heart and allow myself to be guided in my decisions by my sense of what's right. I am really trying. And I think I've done fairly well, even though sometimes I want to kick myself.

Remember how, in a panic, I told Swamp Thing I'd pick Camille up and let her play with Pie on Wednesday? That was last Friday. As of 3pm yesterday I hadn't heard from her. And I had to make a decision. Do I -

A) Assume Swamp Thing forgot and figure I dodged a bullet, or

B) Remain true to my word, call and remind her that I was planning to have Camille over for the morning, or

C) Get in the van, drive as far away from here as I can and begin a new life under an assumed identity so I'll never have to deal with her again?

I've found that the right thing to do is rarely, if ever, the easiest of all the choices before me. I chose B because it was the right thing to do. And get this, she had totally forgotten about it. Fuuuuuuuuck. I apologized to her again that Camille was upset on Friday, even though I know in my heart I didn't do anything wrong.

I hope I don't regret doing the right thing. Because if I do, there's a whole bunch of philosophy I'm going to have to trash.

11 comments:

Kevin said...

You know that the Right Thing (tm) is the right thing to do. And even if Miss Thing drives you crazy, at least you won't drive yourself crazy with guilt for not doing what you should have.

(Just call me Guru. ;) )

Ferris Family said...

Dude, you are so much better than me! I would have gotten the hell out of dodge and never looked back.

knittinontherocks said...

lol... I can totally relate, and can't help but laugh. What a quagmire we find ourselves in. At least you know you did what you "should", and your good deed will be rewarded somewhere along the line.

C'tina said...

Shame on Swamp Thing for making you feel this way. Why would she want a pity party? You did the absolute right thing, now you need to come up with a one-liner for when she pulls this shit again.

Elizabeth said...

I was going to say go with C, but I know that B really was the Right Thing. And doing the Right Thing really is important in life.

Maybe the next right thing will be putting a lot of space between you and Swamp Thing and never apologizing when you've done nothing wrong.

Bezzie said...

Just because B was the right thing doesn't mean you had to *enjoy* doing the right thing. Hee hee! I'll still save you a seat in Hell. ;-)

Eryn said...

I was rooting for "C." You are a better woman than I.

SiressYorkie said...

I woulda joined you on "C". I wanted to change my name to Consuella von Hammertime and specialise in shooting ping pong balls outta my cooch for cash.

But NOOO, you had to go and be the BIGGER PERSON...

ZantiMissKnit said...

Yup, "B" was the right thing, although I probably would have gone with "A" myself. Camille is a nice kid, though, right? You don't mind having her over to play, do you? If it's just that her mom is batshit annoying, but she's a nice kid, let it slide.

And drink.

Poops said...

I love the new quote, up there in red.

Tito...or Pie?

Batty said...

It's amazing how the right thing also tends to be the hard thing. But I've had very good experiences with doing the right thing, even when it looked like I was shooting myself in the foot. This karma thing really works.