Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Today's WPN Theme - Bad Hair Day!

Ok, I'm going to be out of town next week so I hope this batch holds you until then.

How about this idea - I'll invite everyone to nominate their favorite past WPN pic and next week I'll post the winners in a WPN Hall of Shame. I'm gonna go ahead and cast my vote for the Blue Footed Booby girl.

All right, here's this week's crop. And the theme is BAD HAIR DAY.

This guy's username is dream_maker4u.

As long as your dream isn't of him getting a haircut.

Is this like a bald-guy Mohawk?

With all due respect, sir, I don't care what kind of uniform you're wearing, it's impossible to be a skull-crackin' badass when you're a guy with side-swept bangs.

It's pretty much the polar opposite of badass.

Not just bald, but pasty and bald.

Leathery-faced bouffant guy with earrings!

Yay! Santa got my letter!

At first I thought he was wearing a vest.

Ok, you're on the right track, dude - a semi-thick mustache will help you look more badass, but the shiny hairpiece is rather detrimental to the overall effect.

I'm at a loss here. Other than just a resounding "Eeeeewww..."

I can't stop wondering what this dude does for a living.

With the swoopy hair, the lazy eye, and odd wardrobe selection of the jacket over the polo shirt, my guess would be something in radio.
Or shoe sales.

No offense, shoe salespeople.
Or radio people.

Jimmy Buffett apparently got Wilford Brimley's experimental medical supplies in the mail by mistake causing some freaky mitosis shit that scientists are still trying to explain. Meanwhile, this dude makes me think of a gay Captain Kangaroo.

I should probably thank my parents for the years of quality education they funded - all so I could whip out the word "mitosis" (flanked, of course, by the vernacular gems from the opposite end of the diglossic spectrum, "freaky" and "shit") on my silly little blog. Deep down, I know they're proud.

Hey, who let Billy Bob SlingBlade in the Server Room??? SECURITY!!!

And now, the ladies -

Y'know when you kinda hope for their sake that it's a reeeeally old picture? Yeah.

I'll be darned. Women can do the combover too! And it looks just as horrible!

Dammit, Gramma, get off the webcam! You're grossing people out!

This chick's hair is the LEAST of her issues.

I think this lady is this guy's mom.
Remember him, from the October 11th edition?

The traditional Glamour Shots pose doesn't work in the Glamour Shots photos, let alone when you're just hanging out in your white overalls.

And the black eyeliner doesn't make you look glamourous either. It just makes you look icky. And sad.
And scary.

I know there's a lot of peer pressure out there, but please, kids, I can't stress this enough. There are many dangers of abusing alcohol and other drugs you might not have thought of.

Don't ever cut your own bangs when you're drunk. And don't get so drunk that you pass out and let other people cut your bangs.

Alcohol and haircutting utensils are a very hazardous combination. Don't let THIS happen to you. Just say NO.


SiressYorkie said...

Okay, Lazy Eye guy?? That's no combover. That's a photoshop job. Or a wandering beanie.

ZantiMissKnit said...

Drunken Bang Cutter wouldn't be bad looking with a better haircut. She has a geniune, cute face.

My Hall of Famer is definitely Grinch Lady. One week later, she still haunts me. Blue-Footed Booby lady is pretty scary, too, but Grinch Lady reminds me of an attorney I used to work for. I had to show her to ZMrK -- "Hey, look at this -- she makes Kate look PRETTY!"

Amy said...

Sarah, you're too much.

Rima said...

I think Lazy Eye Guy is wearing a yarmulke that is positioned to express his playful stylishness. Or something.

And I vote for Blue Footed Booby Lady.

Bezzie said...

Does anyone else ever wonder when the day will come when they recognize a WPN contestant? Billy Bob looks vaguely like The Mad Scientist's boss.

Sarah said...

If that happens bezzie, I really hope it is just a bad hair, bad lighting, pathetic web cam shot. Dear God, please don't let me see my neighbors or coworkers in the creepy large body, tiny lingerie shots.

SiressYorkie said...

Waaaaaaaaaait a minute...isn't Lazy Eye Guy the same reluctantly smiling guy who was standing in front of the flowering tree from 11 October??

I'm startin' to see a pattern...

Batty said...

That's bad hair all right.

Kevin said...

Hey! I used to sell shoes! Does that mean I'm going to end up in a WPN posting?