Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Wendy's - Now Accepting Applications for Store Managers

An interesting news story caught my attention last week.
Perhaps you saw it.

The Chili Sauce Incident

MIAMI - A Wendy's manager was shot several times in the arm early Tuesday trying to protect the restaurant's chili sauce, authorities said.

A man in the drive-through argued with an employee because he wanted more of the condiment, police said. The worker told the customer that restaurant policy prohibited a customer from getting more than three packets.

The man insisted on ten packets, reports said. The employee complied, but police said the customer wanted more.

When the manager came out to speak to the man, the customer shot the manager, Miami-Dade police spokeswoman Mary Walters said. He was taken to Ryder Trauma Center at Jackson Memorial Hospital with non-life threatening injuries, police said.

The shooter fled with a female passenger.

"I did not know I got shot," store manager Renal Frage told WTVJ-TV in Miami. "When I went back to the office, I saw blood pumping out of my arm, and I was shocked. I was checking myself out and couldn't believe I got shot over some chili sauce."

Frage added: "I got shot over chili sauce. I was trying to figure while in the hospital why someone would shoot me over some chili sauce."



First of all, why is there a corporate-written policy that no Wendy's customer can receive more than three lil bitty chili sauce packets? Have there been incidents in the past? What's the big deal? Would giving someone four or five chili sauce packets get you fired from Wendy's? Is it that much of a threat to Post-9/11 National Security that some Fast Food Restaurant Manager would take a freakin' bullet to protect us? If so, we probably need to be kissing Renal Frage's ass right now.

I've never tasted Wendy's chili sauce. I'm not a big fan of chili sauce, but I personally kinda love it when the McDonald's folks put a big ol' extra handful of ketchup packets in my to-go bag. Makes me feel special. But whatever.

Second of all, we don't know from the story exactly what the dude ordered, but why would anybody want TEN? Is it commonly used to make meth or something? Here's a list of the ingredients: Water, corn syrup, salt, distilled vinegar, natural flavors, xanthan gum and caramel color. I didn't do well in Chemistry, but I certainly don't see Bleach and Ammonia or pseudoephedrine in there. And what the hell is Xanthan Gum?

The only thing I can think of is that maybe the dude wanted to empty all the packets into a squirt gun and use it like mace or something. But why would he do that if he already had an actual gun in his possession?

If it really was innocent, just some dude wanting more Chili Sauce simply because he was craving the taste of Water, corn syrup, salt, distilled vinegar, natural flavors, xanthan gum and caramel color, seriously - what would you possibly order from Wendy's that you'd need ten packets of Chili Sauce to go with it? At that point, it wouldn't even taste like whatever it was anyway. Plus, your tongue would melt off and you wouldn't be able to taste anything else for a little while.

Why not go just buy a bottle of it at Publix and take a big ol' sloppy swig like it was Jack Daniels? What's that? Don't want to pay for it? Dude, YOU HAVE A FUCKING GUN. If you weren't above shooting a Wendy's employee over some hot sauce, I can't imagine that just plain robbing the store wouldn't have crossed your mind. Why couldn't you just say, "I'll be taking this hot sauce, and uh, whatever cash ya got..."?

Perhaps Wendy's will rethink the Chili Sauce Policy for the safety of its employees. Or perhaps they know something that the rest of us don't - that too much Chili Sauce in the hands of an unstable person is far more dangerous than we would like to believe.

RUN!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!
HE'S GOT TEN PACKETS OF CHILI SAUCE!!!!!!!!!!!

7 comments:

April said...

All I know is the sauce is used to make the chili spicier. Don't have a clue if there is a 3/per limit or not - I'll ask Mr. April (Wendy's Manager) tonight.

btw - my code is cumjwiki!

Tactless Wonder said...

Xanthum gum is what they add to food stuffs/sauces to keep them from separating. You can get xanthum powder at any "natural" food store, generally in the bulk foods section.

I've always wanted to try adding it to Hollandaise (sp) sauce to see if it'd actually work.

Bezzie said...

Rest assured, it's not a Post 9/11 thing. At the theater we weren't allowed to give customers more than 3 squirts of butter flavoring. Those were the days before self-serve butter flavoring. However maybe Wendy's Chili Sauce is a component in WDMs. This man might have been a terrorist trying to make a dirty chili bomb.

Batty said...

That's just bizarre!

Ed said...

If it's supposed to be chilli sauce where in the ingredients list is the chilli?

Oh yeah, and sorry to hear tat someone got shot or something.

SiressYorkie said...

Yeeeeeup...those in the condiment business refer to this type of thing as The Thin Red Line.

(Damn, that's the funniest thing I've said all day, and there's no one here to hear it)

Ali said...

PK,

Laughed my butt off at your writing. You never cease to amaze me with your stories. Brilliant writing. You need your own TV show or at least get paid for entertaining the masses.