Monday, December 10, 2007

A Major Award!

Remember how resolute I was about sticking with scarves? Well, I timidly announce that I will, very soon, be taking on something more challenging. Why, you ask? Because I threw my hat in the ring for a contest on Turtlegirl's blog. In order to win the Grande Prize - some beautiful angora yarn (wut smellz like da bunniez) that she spun herself - participants were asked to give one good reason why they should be the winner.

We've discussed my competitive nature.

I, in my zeal to win something, offered up the following entry:

I will, so f*ckin help me, make something other than a scarf... preferably something just beyond my advanced beginner status... and then I will, for as long as it takes, document my progress (or lack thereof) on my blog until I either finish it or go crazy trying. Either way, I guarantee it will be fun to read. It’s like the gift that keeps on giving.

Pick me!

Sweet Turtlegirl viewed this opportunity to let her handiwork become an instrument of learning, and I was thrilled to be named the winner. And then I thought, OH SHIT.

Turtlegirl chose this pattern from the current issue of Knitty. It's called Ice Queen.

There are several elements to this pattern that will be new territory for me.

1. Lace. Lace and I, historically, do not get along. I wish I had taken a picture of Foliage before I frogged it, but seriously, I was too embarrassed by it to post it. And you've all seen the shit I'm NOT embarrassed to post but probably should be.

2. Beads. Like I have the time, patience and manual dexterity to deal with THAT.

3. Dear God, not the Chart! Charts give me a headache just looking at them.

4. And the element which will I will have to learn most immediately: The Provisional Cast On. I've never been able to master this technique, and, as a result, have passed over any pattern that requires it. I'll love what the finished item looks like in the picture, then read over the Materials... Yeah, I got that, got that.... What? Provisional Cast-On? Crap. Forget it. The pattern links to a tutorial, so maybe I'll be okay, but if the first picture I post is one of me curled up in a fetal position, rocking back and forth and sucking my thumb, don't be alarmed.

Folks, this blog's going to get really interesting really quick. And Muggles, fear not. I know a lot of the faithful Beholders of my dubious Brilliance aren't knitters.

But, knitter or not, if you enjoy the schadenfreude of watching someone of reasonable intelligence make an utter ass of herself, Santa's comin' early.

Y'all are in for a fuckin' treat.

I'm so glad I have the NC-17 language warning label.


Kevin said...

You could have shortened your entry in Turtlegirl's contest to "I'm a sucker! Punish me!"

But it's ok, we love you anyway.

Beverly said...

Awesome! I didn't enter the contest because I couldn't come up with a good enough reason to win it, so I'm excited that someone so deserving won. Can't wait to see the progress. Good luck doll!

Ed said...

Ha Ha.

I actually voted for you to win it.

Well what would I do with it.

shiguy4076 said...

Oh how fun. I love that pattern. Sometimes when i knit I just keep repeating I can do it I can do it.
You can do it.

DPUTiger said...

Congrats! (Hi! I'm a regular Turtlegirl reader/commenter) We're all here to help if you get stuck. You can do it! Just think about the windows that will open once you have another trick or two up your sleeve! :)

That's a 7-letter Deborah, never a Deb said...

I don't know where exactly you are, but I'd be happy to lend moral support & suggestions if you get stuck.

Zonda said...

I have faith in you! (congrats btw!! :)

You have no time limit and may I suggest putting the beads on with a crochet've never done it yet, but it has to beat threading hundreds of them on there!! Good luck! :)

PS. the chart, I'd just write out each line of the chart on a 3/5 card in words, not symbols, it may make it easier for you.

Dulcedosa said...

YES! I can't wait to see this one. *snicker*

First, before you get started with the laceweight mohair, might I suggest you familiarize yourself with "feather and fan" by making a simple washcloth out of some Sugar & Cream. Additionally, get yourself one of Turtlegirl's row counters, so you don't lose your place.
The provisional cast-on is a piece of cake. Just crochet a chain and pick up through the bump on the bottom. ;>

turtlegirl76 said...

Shit I didn't think to include a row counter, but the chart looks a bit long for that anyway. But I did include the crochet hook! You can do it!

JRS said...

Congratulations! A most deserving winner!

I am here to offer my services. I'd be happy to:
1) Babysit the Apes for a while so you can concentrate;
2) Go knit together with you, and offer moral support!

I'll be there in a week and a half. Let me know if you want to take me up on either option!

AnneKaelber said...

I've got beads I could donate to this learning experience. Check out my blog [] and look under the category "destash" to see what I've got. Most "single colors" I don't have a whole lot of, but we could probably collect a range of color(s) together that would work (which is what I did for my beaded version of the Huck Lace Shawl).

Email if you're interested in the donation of beads for this project. *smile*