Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Avert your eyes, for I am about to blind you... WITH SCIENCE!!!!

While I wouldn't necessarily describe myself as a multitasker per se, I would definitely say I'm someone who likes to, whenever possible, soften the suckiness of the things I have to do by adding things that I like to do.

For example, if I have to drive 45 minutes to take one of the Apes to some Apetastic activity, I'm playing the Sweeney Todd Soundtrack in the van and singing along as loud as I can with the windows down and embarrassing the hell out of my kids the entire time. Both ways. If I have to sit at the Cooter Rooter's with my feet in the stirrups and my twattage hangin out for two hours, I'm bringing my knitting.

Remember this?

So I have to run my my enchanted dishwasher (the one that's visible only to me) a LOT. And I thought it would be cool if I could felt my knitted wool feltables in the dishwasher while I'm washing the dishes, thereby uniting something that sucks with something that doesn't.

For my preliminary research, I did a search for Dishwasher Felting, and didn't really find anything, so that could only mean one of two things.

Either it's a horrible idea and other people have tried it and it didn't work so nobody bothered to write about it,

OR it's a fucking brilliant idea that no one has ever thought of before and I'm now officially a knitting pioneer with a book deal on the horizon.

I posted my Dishwasher Felting idea on the Knittyboard where I knew I have enough street cred that the other Knitties would encourage me to follow through with it just to see what would happen, in the interest of SCIENCE!

And so, as promised, here are the results of my Very Scientific Research.

The materials used in this experiment:

The Dishwasher

The Knitted Coasters (Made from Lopi wool) BEFORE.

The Friction.

Cuz I'm Loooong, and I'm Stroooong, and I'm down to get the FRICtion on, so Ladies (yeah?) Ladies (yeah?) Do ya wanna roll my Mercedes? (yeah!) Turn around, stick it out, even white boys got ta shout, Baby got Back! (L.A. face with the Oakland Booty!!)

Sorry, I do that every time I hear the word Friction. Aaaaaanyway -

I put the coasters and the friction (Cuz I'm Looooong, and I'm ... sorry) inside a small drawstring bag, and set the dishwasher for Heavy Duty Pots and Pans.

And here's what came out.

Looks exactly the same.

My assessment? Looks like I'll be kissing my street cred goodbye.


Trillian42 said...

No, no, see the street cred comes from having the cojones to risk your enchanted dishwasher in the first place. :D

You could NEVER lose your street cred, chica. You are too cool for that.

Kevin said...

Science. It works, bitches.

Carol said...

But at least you now blogged about it so if someone else wants to dishwasher felt, they know it probably won't work. The sacrifices you make for the betterment of mankind!

Tactless Wonder said...

My Anaconda don't want none unless it's got buns hon'"

Man, it'll take days for that to get out of my head....

But um (hee hee, I am twelve), unless you can make the knit stuff bounce around hard-core in the DW? Enchanted or not, it's not gonna felt...

Nessa said...

Yes I agree with Carol. Now I know not to dishwasher felt. Sorry it didn't work out for you, but I did hear something cool about dryer felting. I think I will go research that a bit...

Kevin said...

OK, my earlier comment was made in haste, when I should have been moving my clothes into the dryer. I've thought more about this, and here's what I came up with:

Being a not-knitter (horror of horrors!), I can't claim to know exactly what difference should be visible from the process of felting. BUT, applying my analytical mind, it would seem that you wouldn't get the results from the dishwasher, because the friction (go ahead, PK, I'll wait).......... wouldn't have been agitated as much as in a washing machine. (That's why that one piece is called an agitator, DADGUMMIT.) Basically, those rocks didn't tumble around enough. I'm sure a device could be constructed to generate the necessary tumbling action in a dishwasher, but is it really worth that much effort to enable your multitasking just that little bit more?

DAMN RIGHT IT IS. Unfortunately, I'm a lazy bastard, so I'll leave the device making up to someone else.

olpphttp://oldladypenpal.wordpress.com said...

Sometimes you cross the line into awesomely creative and entertaining into plain old weird.

Not saying this is one of those times, not saying this isn't one of those times.

cpurl17 said...

And you have clean rocks!

Chelle said...

Carol is right...even proving that something doesn't work is progress. That reminds me...I should blog about the time I tried to hard-cook eggs in my dishwasher...a definite no-go

Beverly said...

You are my hero! Science rocks. My dishwasher thanks you for doing the experiment 'cuz I was soooooo close to trying it myself (had the swatch ready and everything).

Bezzie said...

Negative data. It's not *that* bad!

knitnthings said...

Agitation - that's why it didn't work. But I have good news - you can dye yarn in the dishwasher... it works! And it's FUN!! And you can combine the not so fun laundry with the super fun felting & your inital goal - to do something fun with something sucky - is still in tact. ;)

SiressYorkie said...

You...gak...rocks...dishwasher...*bugs out eyes*

Look, most parents punish their kids for putting rocks and other crap in the dishwasher, and here you're setting a fine example for your Apes.

Ballsy move, though. Sorry it didn't work, but hey, nothing ventured.

Batty said...

I may be creating a monster, but... maybe putting it through one cycle just isn't enough?