Oh yes, I still watch TV!

I will now recap some of the shows I watch regularly, beginning with Celebrity Duets. Spoilers ahead.

Alfonzo Ribiero + Leather Pants + Chaka Khan.
Need I say more?

And, in an unbelievable confluence of Gayness (not that there's anything wrong with that), Jai Rodriguez from Queer Eye sang "Somewhere Over The Rainbow". A solo performance would have been gay enough, but it gets gayer. His partner? Patti Labelle.

I'm totally serious.

And it was an absolutely phenomenal performance. Seriously. It was awesome.

Perhaps that's why Little Richard wasn't there. The stage would have exploded into a huge, sequined, stuffed cremini mushroom cloud. In a white wine sauce.

Cheech was eliminated from the competition. Boo effin hoo, what was he doing there in the first place anyway? And so was Jai, amidst gasps of disbelief (including my own). So who's left? Carlton, Cutiepoo, and Xena. God, that show sucks.


Unfortunately, I missed most of Dancing With The Stars. Shanna Moakler was eliminated, although Jerry Springer was by far the crappiest dancer. It's seriously painful to watch him. He and his partner went totally low-class with a fake kick in the crotch. I guess the Dick Joke Humor crowd called in to keep him in the game. I mean, I'm all for a good dick joke every now and then, but it just didn't work for ya, Jer. Ya know who's really good? Emmit Smith! And Joey Lawrence was really good too. I need to commit myself to the show a little more.

I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE the new season of Top Model! What's that Melrose chick about? And the girl who poured water on someone else's bed and then told everybody she peed on it? Meeeeeee-YOW! I kinda like AJ because she has a Totally 80's Joan Jett thing goin' on. And the twin that did that bulemia pose was so creepy I can't get it the image of it out of my head. If you've never seen America's Next Top Model, it is a GREAT show and you should check it out sometime. Next week they start the makeovers. Woo hoo!!!!

And let's talk about Must See TV! My Name is Earl was hilarious as ever. My favorite line was "Hell, I'd probably read more if people wrote like that all the time" in reference to Randy's tag on the stolen truck. I love that I got my parents to watch Earl. I tried to talk them into watching Office too, but my mom absolutely can't stand the character of Michael Scott. She doesn't think he's funny. And seeing the humor in his character is kinda central to the enjoyability of the show.

The Office was hilarious and controversial and awesome. I nearly spewed Boylan Diet Black Cherry soda at Jim's expression when his new manager said that they had to do Sensitivity Training because of the Scranton office. And I loved how they portrayed Jim and Pam longing for each other. Awwwwwwww. I asked my mom if she watched it, and she said that she tried to, but she felt guilty for laughing at the parts she laughed at. Guess I should explain the concept of the Guilty Pleasure to my mom, if the whole thought of explaining to my mom that Guilt can be Fun didn't weird me out so much.

And ER - I must have missed something. Why did Luka flip out at the end? Is it because of the Abby's emergency hysterectomy? Or is something wrong with the baby that he didn't tell Abby? Or is he remembering the wife and kids he used to have? Are Luka and Abby going to stay together? Sally Field returns next week (dontcha just love her?).


Survivor was just weird. I just kinda felt like Billy's shitty "Why should I waste my energy? Let everyone else waste their energy! I'm just gonna lay here..." attitude was exactly the stereotype he should have been trying harder to shatter. I loved that his tribe so overtly threw the challenge so they could get rid of him - and it worked. And then at Tribal Council when he said all that stuff about sharing some love at first sight moment with Candice? Huh? It'll be interesting to see if Candice has anything to say about Billy. I think at the end of the challenge he said "I'm next", and then Candice said "Well, we love you." and Billy said "I love you" back. I didn't think Candice meant it in a romantic way, I thought she was just being nice to somebody who was about to be kicked off the island, but maybe I'm wrong. We'll see.



Tomorrow is Desperate Housewives and The Race! I hope Babe and Babe come in last. They bug me.


In Actual Reality (i.e. IRL) news, tomorrow we're taking the kids to the Pirate Festival. The boys have costumes. I promise to take pictures.