tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post4792329255463274255..comments2023-06-16T04:20:45.092-05:00Comments on BEHOLD MY BRILLIANCE *: Christmas Break Wrap-upPenny Karma, aka the F-Bomb Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02920792594406507263noreply@blogger.comBlogger31125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-48326997415842497162009-01-13T18:21:00.000-06:002009-01-13T18:21:00.000-06:00Nerf toys suck my nuts. They can't even put an eye...Nerf toys suck my nuts. They can't even put an eye out. What's the point if there's no risk of serious injury?<BR/><BR/>I agree with Anonymous: You should write a book. You're damn funny.Cary McNealhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16991174129999010729noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-11516141244673024422009-01-12T15:16:00.000-06:002009-01-12T15:16:00.000-06:00When I'm on the potty I only take pictures of my f...When I'm on the potty I only take pictures of my feet.Penny Karma, aka the F-Bomb Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02920792594406507263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-3881231818378332162009-01-12T15:15:00.000-06:002009-01-12T15:15:00.000-06:00That's a hand dryer, but Oh my GOD! It does look ...That's a hand dryer, but Oh my GOD! It does look like a toilet!! <BR/><BR/>Eeeew! Chuck Berry Cam stillshot!<BR/><BR/>I feel so dirty!!!Penny Karma, aka the F-Bomb Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02920792594406507263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-77275675666558582912009-01-12T13:19:00.000-06:002009-01-12T13:19:00.000-06:00Lucky Penny, you look HOT in a ponytail while sitt...Lucky Penny, you look HOT in a ponytail while sitting on a toilet. ;)Evil Baritonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14506630495627071854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-26651040390114298932009-01-12T11:36:00.000-06:002009-01-12T11:36:00.000-06:00PK - The doctor says the oozing will clear up with...PK - The doctor says the oozing will clear up with some antibiotics. <BR/><BR/>And please don't get me started on the whole "praying to God when your team wins" thing. My ex-FIL used to pray to God in thanks for giving him a good parking spot. I shit you not. I serioulsy think God has better things to do than get you a front row spot at Chuck E. Cheese.<BR/><BR/>And I should probably mention that I have gotten many compliments on my Genuine Penny Karma Custom Hat that fits my big head without pinching.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-75377854177238510582009-01-12T01:29:00.000-06:002009-01-12T01:29:00.000-06:00I'd watch out for stray lightning bolts if I were ...I'd watch out for stray lightning bolts if I were you, PK...it can still happen...hehehhee...<BR/><BR/>Hey, my verification word is "dicabl"...pretty close to "diabolical". There's a message there somewheres...ChestyLovehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12252367020621459091noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-5411083437816067142009-01-11T11:12:00.000-06:002009-01-11T11:12:00.000-06:00See, language like that is why Jesus is playing on...See, language like that is why Jesus is playing on the <I>other</I> team.Kevin Chttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16698707605545807307noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-39745751419503367612009-01-11T07:57:00.000-06:002009-01-11T07:57:00.000-06:00See, what I can't help thinking about when I see t...See, what I can't help thinking about when I see those Jesus Is My Coach statuettes is what's going through the minds of the kids on the other team when they show up on the field and see Jesus coaching the opposition.<BR/><BR/>"Awww, Jesus Christ, dude.... We're FUCKED."Penny Karma, aka the F-Bomb Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02920792594406507263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-75556942464625109252009-01-10T19:30:00.000-06:002009-01-10T19:30:00.000-06:00Wow, they really need to shuddup. Oh the other ha...Wow, they really need to shuddup. Oh the other hand... hey, I have this great photo of Moses parting the Red Sea... do you think he'd be willing to drop a couple of grand? It was taken by one of the Egyptians who was pursuing the Israelites. He was the only guy smart enough to turn around when he saw that water move. Heh.<BR/><BR/>BTW, there's a catalog... The Catholic Child. They have posters of Jesus playing hockey, basketball, socker, you name it. It really cracks me up.Battyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03892116045581715793noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-74274123310211109752009-01-10T18:07:00.000-06:002009-01-10T18:07:00.000-06:00Oh, Honey, you're oozing with charm.You really sho...Oh, Honey, you're <I>oozing</I> with charm.<BR/><BR/>You really should get that checked out. ;)<BR/><BR/><BR/><BR/>NOW people are reeeeally guessing.Penny Karma, aka the F-Bomb Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02920792594406507263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-91748714351423516302009-01-10T17:22:00.000-06:002009-01-10T17:22:00.000-06:00PK,I prefer to keep people guessing (its a part of...PK,<BR/><BR/>I prefer to keep people guessing (its a part of my charm)<BR/><BR/><A HREF="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3511/3183921718_743a37d8d3.jpg?v=0" REL="nofollow">easier link to the picture</A>Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-77523975864757829892009-01-10T10:46:00.000-06:002009-01-10T10:46:00.000-06:00Kevin, you should specify that you mean LITERALLY ...Kevin, you should specify that you mean LITERALLY kicking around the office.Penny Karma, aka the F-Bomb Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02920792594406507263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-73167283287118833632009-01-10T04:17:00.000-06:002009-01-10T04:17:00.000-06:00Whenever my in laws visit, my Buddy Christ is disp...Whenever my in laws visit, my Buddy Christ is displayed in a prominent place. I even move him about to get more impact. SMIL probably thinks he's following her...hehehe...<BR/><BR/>Yeah, the Queen's mug is plastered anywhere and everywhere. It's really kind shocking where her face turns up. It wasn't until my last year in England when I heard that Beatles song, "Her Majesty's a pretty nice girl, but she doesn't have much to say..." hehehe...ChestyLovehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12252367020621459091noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-90825247374783592862009-01-09T20:37:00.000-06:002009-01-09T20:37:00.000-06:00"Buddy Christ" isn't the official name, just somet..."Buddy Christ" isn't the official name, just something we've been kicking around the office...<BR/><BR/>http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3511/3183921718_743a37d8d3.jpg?v=0Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-32196210739924268362009-01-09T16:35:00.000-06:002009-01-09T16:35:00.000-06:00They used to have a whole sex toy nativity on that...They used to have a whole sex toy nativity on that site, PK. Freakin' awesome.<BR/><BR/>Yorkie, one of my friends from a million years ago collected Pope stuff, anything with his face on it was fair game. We're out to dinner with some people we were working with at the time and this collection of hers came up in conversation. One of the guys we were with completely misunderstood the fascination, turns to her and lecherously says, "So, you wanna hose the Pope?" <BR/><BR/>Some people just don't get it.<BR/><BR/>I like tacky stuff with the Queen of England on it. My favorite is the shot glass. It's gilded and not supposed to go in the dishwasher which often prompts me to yell, "Who put The Queen in the dishwasher!?" <BR/><BR/>I need to get a new Buddy Christ for my dashboard. You know what would be awesome? A Virgin Mary dash board hula girl. I'm going to have to work on that...Kashmir Knitterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12986831549467594832noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-18488103892604734592009-01-09T12:56:00.000-06:002009-01-09T12:56:00.000-06:00Whoops, sorry Kashmir...I think we might've had a ...Whoops, sorry Kashmir...I think we might've had a different set of soccer chicks growing up. No offense meant.<BR/><BR/>Penny, when I was in Rome and visited the Vatican, I saw the face of Jesus (and the Pope) plastered over every possible piece of tat possible. You'd think that Rome, the Holy See, would be a bit more attentive, but I guess if St Peter's can be guarded by Swiss guards who look like Donald Duck, they can have tackily decorated souvenirs.<BR/><BR/>I did get a bottle opener with the former Pope's face on it. We call it The Popener. We joked that there should be a condom with the Pope's face on it called The Vaticon. Or the Pope-a-lactic.<BR/><BR/>I could go on like this all day, I really could.ChestyLovehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12252367020621459091noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-44052757307957316132009-01-08T19:56:00.000-06:002009-01-08T19:56:00.000-06:00Sadly, they don't carry this at the Catholic Suppl...Sadly, they don't carry this at the Catholic Supply store:<BR/><BR/><A HREF="http://www.divine-interventions.com/baby.php" REL="nofollow">http://www.divine-interventions.com/baby.php</A>Penny Karma, aka the F-Bomb Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02920792594406507263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-14140992970470890782009-01-08T17:00:00.000-06:002009-01-08T17:00:00.000-06:00That Hockey Jesus statue is actually one of a coll...That Hockey Jesus statue is actually one of a collection, if I remember correctly. I saw them on Conan O'Brien several years ago (geez, was that 7 years ago already?)<BR/><BR/>Ah yes, here they are:<BR/><A HREF="http://www.catholicshopper.com/products/inspirational_sport_statues.html" REL="nofollow">Page 1</A> features Jesus dry-humping a boy playing baseball, elbowing a soccer player, and getting a reach-around from a boy in a football helmet.<BR/><A HREF="http://www.catholicshopper.com/products/inspirational_sport_statues2.html" REL="nofollow">Page 2</A> has Jesus dancing with little girls, teaching a girl how to "putt", encouraging violence, and totally being the third wheel in the hockey statue.<BR/><A HREF="http://www.catholicshopper.com/products/inspirational_sport_statues3.html" REL="nofollow">Page 3</A> has some (by now) surprisingly innocuous biking/skating, skiing, and tennis pictures, but I'm a bit suspicious of him kneeling with the two girls in leotards (What's the message? "Jesus loves flexible girls, just like normal guys"?), and I <I>really</I> don't want to know what he's going to do with that stick in the track photo.<BR/><BR/>And I'll never forget the <A HREF="http://www.bobbleheadstore.net/bobble/jesus.htm" REL="nofollow">Jesus Bobble Head</A> a former coworker (at a Christian college) got from his brother-in-law.<BR/><BR/>Wow, too many jokes available with this word verification: chumseer. In this context, it kind of reminds me of <A HREF="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Buddy_christ.jpg" REL="nofollow">Buddy Christ</A>.Kevin Chttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16698707605545807307noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-26807967555081285522009-01-08T16:30:00.000-06:002009-01-08T16:30:00.000-06:00I only started reading your blog regularly over th...I only started reading your blog regularly over the last few months and love it. Although your reputation obviously preceded you on the knittyboard.<BR/><BR/>I agree with commenter above, you should write a book. Or you and Kashmir & Yorkie should write a book. I don't have the wit that you guys do, but I'm sure you could come up with something infinitely more marketable than Drunk, Divorced and Covered in Cat Hair.<BR/><BR/>Every paragraph of your post was funny, but what made me snort my Michelob Ultra on the keyboard was the hockey playing Jesus. Priceless (or $5.99, whatever!)Discoknitshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17592787127396090112noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-19658809671935802522009-01-08T15:00:00.000-06:002009-01-08T15:00:00.000-06:00Yorkie, I actually was complimenting those girls. ...Yorkie, <BR/><BR/>I actually was complimenting those girls. One girl I knew went on to be in the short lived women's soccer league here in the US. Those girls were brutally awesome. I was TERRIBLE and our team still kicked ass just because there were 3 girls who didn't need any of the rest of us to show up.Kashmir Knitterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12986831549467594832noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-45936086199604781662009-01-08T13:39:00.000-06:002009-01-08T13:39:00.000-06:00I sort of think you're a post-feminist soccer mom ...I sort of think you're a post-feminist soccer mom there, PK. Making fun of a little girl with a bow in her hair? Wanting to rip the throat out of some dimwitted kid who scored for the other team? The down vest and the pony tail and the look that says, Back the fuck up?<BR/><BR/>Yep. WHOOOLE new kinda soccer mom. The one that actually expresses what we're all thinking.<BR/><BR/>Listen, I grew up in a soccer family...started playing when I was 4 and made all-star teams every year till I was 12 and blew out my knee. My dad coached. I spent a lot of time at tournaments, practices, games...everything. And in every case, the little girls start out wearing bows in their hair because frankly, they don't give a shit about the ball going in the goal...they just wanna look cute in the uniform. And the boys are like well-coordinated gorillas, just kicking the ball as hard as they can because they can.<BR/><BR/>And Kashmir, I TOTALLY know about the soccer whores you mentioned. I spent about 5 years of my life being bullied by such girls. Happily, I think they all fell into loveless marriages and developed drinking problems.<BR/><BR/>BTW, your Aldi gifts hit new lows. If you're gonna give a gift just to GIVE a gift, just do a card for $10.00 and call it a day.ChestyLovehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12252367020621459091noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-16640168818195844282009-01-08T12:45:00.000-06:002009-01-08T12:45:00.000-06:00I love the teacher/drinking/medicine rant. Hilario...I love the teacher/drinking/medicine rant. Hilarious! BTW the Chuck E Cheese guy was Nolan Bushnell, the Atari founder (and the first one was about a 1/2 hour South of us). He created a place for his games to be played (and make him money) by the whole family rather than just bar frequenters who saw them before. I'm not a huge fan, but it does have its moment - like air conditioning in summer and heat in winter.Elspethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04902156528137763262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-18116835064838062522009-01-08T12:34:00.000-06:002009-01-08T12:34:00.000-06:00Yeah... Jesus saves, but Gretzky scores on the reb...Yeah... Jesus saves, but Gretzky scores on the rebound.<BR/><BR/>Just sayin'.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-7494276876948909132009-01-08T12:30:00.000-06:002009-01-08T12:30:00.000-06:00Okay, I'm laughing my ass off here. I'm going to h...Okay, I'm laughing my ass off here. I'm going to have to reread this as I type my comment because there was just SO MUCH I wanted to say as I was reading it. Next time I'll take notes.<BR/><BR/>First of all the Aldis are trash but you know that. I just thought it bore repeating. You know, when I imagine them I usually picture a whole family that looks like <A HREF="http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b346/a429MySpace/Insults/1163955324-douchebag.jpg" REL="nofollow">this guy</A> at different ages (female versions have a pony tail). <BR/><BR/>My definition of photography is the process, activity and art of creating still or moving pictures by recording radiation on a sensitive medium, such as a film, or an electronic sensor. Light patterns reflected or emitted from objects activate a sensitive chemical or electronic sensor during a timed exposure, usually through a photographic lens in a device known as a camera that also stores the resulting information chemically or electronically. Which means "photography" was impossible in Ancient Egypt because there were no cameras. Your FIL can kiss my ass.<BR/><BR/>Rock Band is so awesome. Do you have Xbox live? We should play online!<BR/><BR/>That DIC Classy is the exact one I've been drooling over for six months. I wish I could afford a sweater's worth or that ANYONE in town would carry it!<BR/><BR/>I love Catholic supply stores. I particularly love buying vestments for people who only intend to use them sacrilegiously. I totally used to know a guy who LOVED dressing up like a priest when we went bar hopping.<BR/><BR/>I think the Chuck E. Cheese guy's hell will be spending all eternity in a Chuck E. Cheese.<BR/><BR/>I was on a soccer team when I was 10. We won our division or whatever it was that year. A bunch of the girls on our team had elaborate hair dos and matching scrunchies/hairbows/clips. You did NOT mess with those girls. Those girls would KILL you. Those girls were freaking awesome at soccer, so much so that they could wear that kind of crap and not even have to worry about any crap because they could run up the score in an embarrassing way. That was a fun year. <BR/><BR/>Over praising parents are sad.<BR/><BR/>Oh, see if the intervention team can send you to a rehab out here in California (we have tons of them), I'll bust you out so we can party. ;)Kashmir Knitterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12986831549467594832noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17399290.post-22402709925621102362009-01-08T12:18:00.000-06:002009-01-08T12:18:00.000-06:00I love the Jesus Hockey Statue! Every little boys...I love the Jesus Hockey Statue! Every little boys' bedroom needs one of those. <BR/>My 2 monkeys are playing school district soccer. Coop scored on his own team, recognized the mistake, and then yelled at me when I said he had good speed on the ball. Perhaps we will play against you soon, I will sit there in all my non-soccer-mom glory with you.Ferris Familyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06676231789726316205noreply@blogger.com